Now, sadly, there will be times where we will meet someone and develop a correspondence with them that will last more than an hour…and it will end badly.  Maybe you liked her wild and crazy personality…until you realized she was crazy.  Maybe you like his dirty talk…until you realized he was just another perv.  Sometimes we think people are different from who they really are.  Sometimes we give them the benefit of the doubt or give them time to prove themselves otherwise.  And when we can offer them no more chances to prove to us that we can connect on different levels, we part ways into that adult dating abyss.

Other times, are adult dating correspondences simply fade away.  Without warning, they just fizzle out.  The person you met from the online adult dating site and typed to on your IM client is simply gone.  Perhaps you and your new adult dating buddy had some great late night telephone conversations.  One day you just realize that poof, they are gone.  Don’t worry.  You didn’t leave off on bad terms and before you know it one of you will contact the other to say hello or ask how they are doing.  It’s called keeping in touch or “touching base”.  This is just as natural in the adult dating world as it is in the networking that occurs in the “real” world.

Perhaps you really had a fancy for this person that you haven’t spoken to in a while.  Before you know it, you may end up developing or re-kindling a more adult dating type of relationship rather than one that is more along the lines of strictly friendship.  This is a frequent occurrence in the adult dating world.  It’s because life is based on timing.  Sometimes the initial timing is simply just not right and needs to run it’s natural course.  This is also why it is important to maintain a positive, upbeat, non-negative attitude when it comes to adult dating.  You never know what can happen or what the future brings.

Now, by all means, this does not mean that you will find the love of your life in this way.  It simply means that when you think you have lost the chance to experience a certain level of intimacy and romance with a potential adult dating partner, it is not always the case.  The simple moral of this story is to keep your chin up.  Accept people as they are.  Accept that they may have been busy or occupied by something or someone else at the time things seemed to fade.  Patterns in life seem to follow a circular motion, but that does in no way mean we are standing still.

So remember, don’t burn your bridges.  Until next time, be positive and happy adult dating.

We begin to take things in stride.  Our ego’s are no longer hurt or bruised.  This type of desensitization does not always stop here, however.  It may affect how we interact with people we would like to meet.  Perhaps we begin to hold back about what we share right away with a potential adult dating partner.  Perhaps we become a little more aloof.  I suppose this could be a defense mechanism, however I think it is simply more about not caring as much.

For those of us who are new to the adult dating scene we may fight this natural progression.  Resistance is futile as it is a naturally occurring progression.  We can not hide from nor fight human nature.  I also believe that this desensitization of the adult dating world happens because the people we interact with have already come to the point we ourselves may just be realizing.  They exhibit the behavior of not caring (by not giving the time of day, let alone a polite response).  It basically perpetuates itself.

The effects of being desensitized does not stop here and can be more widespread.  For instance, we may not offer the support to our friends that may be in relationship trouble.  We may simply just not care.  We may even offer the wrong advice or tell them to not worry about it because relationships are a dime a dozen.  When we have been out in the wild that is the adult dating for a while, people almost begin to feel…disposable.  I know it sounds harsh and awful, but it does happen.

The only reason I’m talking about this today is that I want people to be aware that adult dating can desensitize us to certain aspects of life and the effects can be insidious.  Realize that a certain amount of desensitization in the adult dating world can be positive, but it really should be kept in check.  This can only happen once you are aware of it’s existence.

Is there an end to the detriment that this behavior can exude left unleashed and unchecked?  I don’t have that answer and ultimately it is up to the individual as such effects are always unique to each individual.  However, I think that things can change when a person has success in the adult dating world and finds themselves in a relationship.  So, there is hope.

In the end, do not be afraid of being desensitized.  It may or may not happen.  Inevitably, your adult dating experiences will, like all experiences, lend themselves to shaping who you are.

It’s easy for us to believe what is presented to us, but how much faith should we have in these tools.  Certainly a good amount of research has gone into the development of compatibility tests.  The tests themselves are not new and have been around and developed over quite some time.  However, I think we are still quite far away from predicting and determining human behavior.

Certainly, there are factors to consider when using compatibility tests whether they be for the purpose of adult dating or some other use.  For instance, was the person taking the test honest?  Did they understand all of the questions presented to them and answer them accurately?  How well researched and thorough was the construction of the test?  How current was the data that was implemented in the forming of the test?  On the same hand, how truthful, honest and accurate are your responses?  How many factors comprise the makeup of the test itself?

So, you can see that there are many factors involved in determining the accuracy and validity of such test found on adult dating sites.  I would like to point you to “The Truth About Compatibility Testing“, which is a great article that contains quite a bit of information on this very topic and it’s involvement with regard to adult dating.

I’m sure you are familiar with horoscopes.  What do horoscopes have to do with online adult dating and compatibility tests?  I’m glad you asked.  See, there is a certain ambiguity associated with horoscopes.  Have you ever read a horoscope for a different sign and thought to yourself that it also applies to you?  And then read another and have the same thought.  And so on and son.  I feel that the same can apply to compatibility tests and personality tests alike.  A quick change or different answer here, a tweak there and the results can be completely different.  Not only that, you may lean in one personality direction one day and another the next.  Our emotions play a big roll in how we feel and also in determining our perceived personality.

Once you have taken a personality test, which is essentially what a compatibility test is comprised of, you will see your results and think, “hey, that is me”.  If you were to change your answers or read the other types of personalities you would probably also agree with much of what you find, much like the horoscope.  There is a term for just this type of occurrence.  It is known as “The Forer Effect“.  You should check out that article as well as researching it in Google.  It is fascinating and explains what you has probably already crossed your mind.  Here is the Google link:  Forer Effect

Please keep in mind that these are only my thoughts.  I’m simply trying to get the reader to question certain aspects of adult dating and the tools presented to us as to whether or not they are gimmicks or actually contain any merit.  In the end, take a few tests yourself and see if you think it is worth taking the time away from your normal adult dating time.  See how accurate the results are for you and whether or not the tests finds someone for you that you would not ordinarily have found on your own.

All in all, this is an interesting topic because some adult dating sites use such types of testing as their main marketing strategy to get you to join.  Do some testing on your own and make your own determination as to whether or not a handful of people doing research can pick out a better adult dating partner than you yourself can.

Happy adult dating and keep those thinking caps on.  Thanks for reading!

Age really is just a number.  You need to talk with someone or hang out or go on a date with them before you judge them based solely on their age.  When you really start to think about, it should soon hit you as if an epiphany how ridiculous it is to use age as a determination as to whether or not an adult dating partner is suitable for you based solely on age.  There are way too many other factors to take into consideration that should have a much higher priority than age as a factor concerning adult dating.  Heck, most people don’t act there “age” anyway.  Don’t read that as most people act older than they are either.  I did not say that.  I said they do not act their age.  Some twenty somethings act like they are thirty somethings and vice-versa.  Of course, you can perpetuate this through all age brackets.

I’m not the only one beating this drum.  I know that there are many people in the adult dating scene that understand the point I’m trying to make.  In fact, make sure you have a listen to “The Sunscreen Song”, pay special attention to the bit concerning the forty year old friends.

To take this up another level.  I must say that sometimes I am quite frankly appalled at the attitude some in the adult dating scene take when it comes to age as being a factor.  If you want to use it as an excuse, rather than simply being honest, that is on you.  But if you really have a concrete boundary set when it comes to age, here is a fitting word lesson for you:

ig·no·rant (gnr-nt)

You know exactly what I mean.  You share more of yourself with someone who you think will never be a part of your life.  A person that has no ties to the other people you know.  They are outside of the “circle”.  We’ve all done it, don’t deny it.

I find that this usually occurs when we are meeting people and we find someone that we don’t envision as being an adult dating partner.  When we are in the adult dating mode, we talk to people and try to form new relationships.  Even though we may find a person that we initially met because of our adult dating mindset, we may find that we know before hand, for various reasons, that we will not be forming a relationship with this person on an intimate adult dating level.  Yet, we may find that we still “chat”.  And this is where the danger lies.

You see, at first you think, “well, this isn’t going anywhere so what I say really does not matter.  it’s just someone to talk to and vent.”  See, that vent part is not a conscious decision.  It’s just there, lingering in the back of your mind.  Before you know it you are venting and spilling all sorts of information about yourself that formally resided in the doldrums of that thing of yours called a brain.

Somewhere down the line you realize that you’ve been talking to this person for quite some time.  In fact, you’ve actually become friends.  However, your friendship is based on a different you.  Not the you that you would want necessarily dive right into.  In fact, you may be viewed as someone that just complains.  The bottom line is, the perfect stranger syndrome has painted you in a corner and most like has painted you in a negative light.  Your friendship will never amount to more than the way it began.  Not only that, you may have lost an opportunity to meet a new adult dating partner through what should have been a new friend and a potential contact for networking which could have allowed you to broaden your adult dating horizons.

The bottom line is, don’t spill your guts to a person that you don’t know because you need to vent.  Either find a confidant, get a psychiatrist or write it down in a diary or journal.  I know that you are meeting lots of new people during your rein of adult dating, but do your best not to let this happen.  You will put yourself in an awkward stage of friend land and will never be able to climb out of it.  You will also lose the opportunity to broaden your adult dating network and will only be painting yourself into a corner.

I hope this makes sense to you.  I know it will make more sense if you have had this experience first hand and can relate to what I’m writing about.  I also know that it can be difficult to go against your human nature, but the fact that we are human allows us to overcome this.

Thanks for reading and happy adult dating everybody!

Based, yes, on my personal experience, there have been many people in my life that I felt were the person that I could spend the rest of my life with.  I know, I know, please hold the applause.  The truth is, it is really not that hard to find someone that you connect with.  I think it’s people’s predisposition that leads them to not only believe this, but also make it true.  Mind over matter if you will.

Once you begin your adult dating endeavour, you will soon realize that what I’m saying is true.  Now this does not mean that you will fall in love with every single that you meet in the adult dating game.  But you may be surprised how often it can occur.  It’s not a bad thing.  In fact, you should be encouraged by it.

I know that this may take some of the mystique and allure out of adult dating for some.  I also know that it may down right go against everything you believe to be true and seem very unromantic.  I’m not here to destroy your idea of romance.  Romance is what you make of it.  Romance is defined by the connection that you make with a new partner you meet in the adult dating scene.  And, on the contrary, you should be encouraged to hear this.  If perhaps you have already felt this strong connection that you believe only happens a few times during a person’s lifetime, don’t worry, it will happen again.

I’m not trying to trivialize love or relationships formed from adult dating.  I’m just trying to put things into perspective.  My basic point is that love is not akin to the nine lives of cats.  Once you use up a couple, you do not have a set amount left.  Love is not comparable to the life force you have left in a video game.  Love is there for the taking and is all around you, like the song.  Romance is what you make of it.

Love is not a limited supply or a non-renewable resource.  Take solace in this and let it enhance your adult dating experiences.  Also, be cautious and don’t hurry love (like another song).  You will know when something there is strong.  Most importantly, don’t despair if your relationship has ended.  Love is still out there, in a different form ready and waiting for you.  Yes, there is plenty of love out there for you in your journey down the path that is adult dating.

Ah, the holiday season is upon us.  Merry making is abound.  People are full of the spirit of generosity (with the exception of road rage and long lines).  Everyone is happy.  Families are together.  Everyone is hugging and exchanging pleasantries.  And you are thinking, “I don’t have a date to bring to so and so’s for the day”.  Yup, you are lonely, even if just a little.  Of course, this is perfectly natural.  This is the time when couples thrive and appreciate the companionship that they share.  I mean, after all, the holidays are all about sharing and appreciating companionship.

Stop thinking about an ex you may have had in the past that was your primary partner to share the holidays with.  You know, the one that would drag you to their family’s get together.  Even though you didn’t like the food or the long drive, you did appreciate the feeling of people wanting to see you.

Now you are the single one.  The person that gets their spot at the table set for just one.  No one is asking who you are bringing to dinner.  I’m here to tell you that it’s okay to eat dinner alone, but you don’t have to spend the evening alone on your couch with you and your pet.  You have the Internet, or you wouldn’t be reading this, so take advantage of it and take advantage of this time of year and let your fingers get you back into the adult dating game.

Adult dating has never been easier given the tools we have at our disposal these days.  There are plenty of people who feel just like you.  They want someone around to have fun with this time of year, just like you.  Online adult dating sites will easily help you find a partner that is perfect for the holidays.  And who knows, maybe this time it will last longer than that.  : -)

Millions of people turn to online adult dating sites these days because it is such an effective means of meeting new people.  You are not alone and you should take solace in that fact.  In fact, adult dating is just about that, not being alone.

Rather than letting the holidays get you down, let them motivate you and help you get your adult dating life back into full swing.  Go to the following link and check the highly recommended adult dating sites I’ve listed just for you:

A list of adult dating sites

Don’t let the notion that you will only find perverts or people that are simply cruising adult dating sites for mere entertainment sway you from trying out a viable medium that is highly conducive and designed for just that, meeting people.  I hear people scoff at adult dating sites all the time.  They will make jokes or other remarks and then…they try one.  Guess what, they are the first ones telling their friends about adult dating sites and telling them how good they are for meeting other adult singles.

Adult personals are nothing new.  In fact, they have been around for a long time.  Just like anything else in life, don’t make assumptions about adult dating on the Internet until you’ve garnered enough knowledge and at least have given it a shot yourself.  You may be pleasantly surprised with the experiences you have on an adult dating site.  After all, many, many people have met their spouse online.   Don’t be ignorant because you are not well informed about something.  Take the plunge and see for yourself.  Adult dating sites rule!

Go here for a list of recommended adult dating sites.

Dating Adult Personals

Obviously, in the adult dating world some people are “playas“.  What is not so obvious are the people that need to keep people on the peripheral.  The people who need satellites consisting of others that comprise or make up a support group.  The satellite individuals in this support group will never get to close to these needy people on any real type of intimate level concerning adult dating.  These satellites are not in “let’s just be friends land”, they are somewhere else.  Further out yet closer in some ways.

Each person has certain aspects to their personalities.  Almost to the effect of having different persona’s.  For instance, the fed up you, the happy you, the passionate about this or that you, this is your hobby, this is your pet peeve…  Chances are, you will not be able to find one person that agrees with everything you believe in, and this is natural.  Besides, who would want to be with someone that is on the exact same page as themselves?

Back to the point, sort of.  The person I’m talking about “needs” to find others to talk with concerning certain aspects of their persona’s.  They may need to feed the sex aspect of one of their inner personae but can’t do that with the people in their circle of friends that they interact with in day to day life.  They require something a little more…anonymous.  They may also require someone in their life that will satisfy the moral aspect of their personalities, akin to confessing to a priest.  Again, the theme here is that the target or satellite needs to be far enough away.  A certain impersonal requirement must be met in order to cultivate a sustained outlet for the satisfaction of the aspect at hand.

Online adult dating sites are a great way for people to meet others and find what they are looking for.  As a member of an adult dating site, you have to be aware that these people exist.  They are almost akin to the scammers that litter the Internet.  When you meet such a person, or are targeted by a person with such intentions, they will absolutely not tell you why they want a relationship with you.  They will not tell you what their intentions are because they may not even realize that they are in fact affected by the needs of certain aspects of their personae.   If they told you what they wanted from you from the beginning, this would not be a “problem”.  It would not be underhanded or shifty.

The bottom line is that while you are meeting people at an online adult dating site, beware of people like this.  They are a different breed of people that most people have a hard time spotting.  Maybe you chat with someone you met on an adult dating site and all they want to talk about is sex.  Maybe every conversation you have always turns into the same theme, every time you chat.  If so, this is a good indication that the person at the other end of the chat is using you to focus on and satisfy one of the needs that they have.  If you can never get out of the moral conversation and elevate it to something a little more “frisky” (which is normal between two people that are attracted to one another), then chances are you are simply the “moral” guy.  Similar to when you were in high school and the girl you liked was having sex with everyone else but never thought of you that way.

These types of people at adult dating sites can get your hopes up.  They can get you going in a sexual manner and in the opposite way as in, “This person is the one!  We click and see (this subject) the exact same way!”.  Of course, when you want to meet this person in person, they retreat and throw a weird vibe your way.  If you’ve had this happen to you then you know what I’m referring to.  Maybe it is starting to make sense to you now.

In closing, always go into any type of relationship with your eyes open.  Don’t give in blindly to your own needs and let others take advantage of you.  It is very easy to fall into this, especially when it comes to adult dating.  Once you are able to spot these types of people, you can either choose not to interact with them or you can accept them for who they are and still have fun and maintain a “different” type of adult dating relationship with them.  Once you have spotted them it is up to you to decide how you wish to proceed.

I hope this was clear enough and helpful to some of you.  Keep in mind that the above is only my opinion and how I see things.  It is not documented in terms of a psychological absolute (as far as I know).  This is just one of my personal theories.

Knowledge is power!  Have fun and have  fuitful and safe online adult dating experiences.

You are so sold on your looks that all you do is bitch and complain about men.  You begin to play games with them to get things that you want.  You will always find the wrong type of guy.  It’s a creature of your own doing at this point.  You’ve stopped giving guys a chance to talk to you.  I don’t feel bad for you, and neither do the rest of the good guys.  You see, we give you the same treatment you’ve given us.  You’ve successfully made yourself unapproachable by the right guys.  That’s why you attract all of the wrong guys.  Think about it.

You have really put yourself in a bad spot here.  Now, all of the good guys are going to treat you as if they are bad guys because they do not trust you.  They know you have attitude.  And not in a good way.  So what’s a hot girl to do?  It depends.

First off, if you truly want to meet a good guy you have to make yourself approachable.  Yes, that means trying to have an actual normal conversation with an actual man.  Crazy idea, isn’t it.  You have to prove that you do not have a bad attitude in order to be taken seriously.  You actually have act nice and normal.  Oh yeah, and mature.  If you don’t know what that is, just look it up.  You can find it in a book called the dictionary.

Oh well, I know this post won’t change the world.  I know it may sound a little harsh, but this is how us good guys see it.  Don’t shoot the messenger (not that your opinion means anything to me).

Oh yeah, and please, please stay off the online line adult dating sites.  We do not want you there.  You are not welcome and we will harass you, lol.

: -)